The Golden Chariot

December 21, 2006 by admin.

Ramblers R Us

At one point in my father’s car buying career, he purchased a wonderful little golden tank called the American Motors Rambler station wagon. The back part of the station wagon was my brother Mark and I, and when we traveled, the occasional 20 suitcases. I believe it was a 1966 gold-colored Rambler, with a luggage rack on top. When the family moved overseas or back to the States, the old Rambler was shipped to us by boat. That old car made it to three continents and ran like a top, wacky sometimes, but a great car. When we took our vacation to Barcelona Spain, we drove through southern France, with a roof full of luggage; two kids hanging out the back, and my poor father swearing his brains out at the lousy drivers. I am sure that James Bond never imagined cruising the French Riviera in a Rambler, with a wife and two kids. The food was either so expensive or so un-American that we ate French bread with peanut butter and jelly every day during that vacation. When we traveled in the mountains of Italy on another vacation, we had this huge steamer trunk strapped to the roof. We brought everything but the kitchen sink. So here we are flying down a highway in Italy, trying to keep up with the flow of traffic, and suddenly a terrifying sound hit our ears. The scrapping of metal on the roof was horrifying. I glanced out the back window of the station wagon just in time to see the steamer trunk hydroplaning down the highway. With an air cushion underneath it, the trunk bounced just off the surface of the road. It did not hit any other cars and finally it lost momentum and skidded off the road. We made a mad U turn and went back to check on the trunk, knowing that it was destroyed on impact. We had visions of our underwear scattered all over the Italian landscape. But miracles of miracles, the trunk was still in one piece, minus a few dents. That steamer trunk probably weighted at least 125 pounds, and was one lethal flying object that day. Thank goodness it did not hit anyone.

On another trip in the old Rambler in Italy, my brother and father were in a bad accident. A crazy Italian broadsided the Rambler because he did not feel like steering around the Rambler. My dad was taking a left when this Kamikaze came flying out of nowhere and crashed into the side of the station wagon. My brother got a lot of glass shards thrown into his back and it was very painful. When this Italian showed up in traffic court to explain the accident, his defense was that our Rambler was too long and he was not used to long cars like that so he miss timed his point of contact. The nerve of the idiot, I am surprised that my Dad did not take the guy for a long ride off a short pier.

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